Growing up whenever someone asked me what super power I wanted I always said telekinesis. I wanted to be able to read people’s minds and know how they thought and what they were thinking. 

This want comes from my abandonment. If someone is going to leave me I want to know.

It also comes from curiosity in the different ways we all think. 

At the moment I am enjoying a day without my classmates. I have been frustrated with all the personalities but also frustrated that I feel so left out. This has been a struggle my whole life.

I tend to have trouble getting along with people. Some of it I know is me. I’m harsh and very honest. People find me abrasive when usually that is not my intension. 

Getting along with strangers has never been hard. I’m good at superficial interactions, especially when I know they are temporary. 

It’s only when I tend to show whom I really am that people love or hate me.

A blind spot I have is I tend to tell people my thoughts and they judge me for them individually instead of looking at them from the whole picture… yet I do the same.

Tolerance is hard, I’m trying… staying true to who I am while trying to be tolerant and patient are hard. 

Maybe those contribute to why I have such a hard time making friends, I find people more interesting than actually agreeing.

I’m walking through Central Park reflecting on the last two weeks. So many different people and even if I don’t like them all, I certainly hold love for their individuality. 

After all there are parts of myself I don’t like but I love my overall person.